It's February 20th and I finished playing Perfect Tides: Station To Station as 11 hours.

Honestly, it's hard to summarize my conclusions in a way that feels productive but I'll try my best: the last half of STS feels like this tumbling momentum in the best way, each moment leads to the next in ways that feel urgent, you desperately need to know how to right Mara's ship, looking for the right things to read or say to course correct to any sort of her normalcy. I became so caught up in the experience on screen that I was losing context for how I approached everything prior, I felt my decision making become more desperate and what outcomes I wanted for our main character seemed to transform over and over as she desperately tries to renegotiate the momentum of her summer. I'm trying to avoid being explicit for the sake of not spoiling the experience. But I fell into the same trap that Mara did, I had no idea what she wanted or I wanted for her until we were both buried in the consequences of multiple reactions to prior consequences.

The game feels so miraculous to me in the moment. I can imagine the endless possibilities of a Mara with different priorities, what I was clingy instead of avoidant, what I actually prioritized her academic career like I thought I was, could I have saved her any heartache? Could I have doomed her, in failing to break up with her first shitty long-distance boyfriend. I don't even want to consider interacting with Theo Newman more than I already have, but what would that have in store for her? What if I gave the right book to Daniel, or at least had the know-how to defend the one I gave him, would I not have seen through him in the way I did, would I not be able to connect the dots of what he's dismissive of? The odds are, like in many games that there isn't as much breadth as there appears to be, but for the magic moment before I decide to play again, anything could be possible. I think I'll avoid atomizing every decision for a while, in order to keep that magic safe.

I loved the ending, I can imagine it not singing for some, but for me it feels so natural. I'm kind of reminded of Boku No Natsuyasumi 2 which, in a similar vein, really reaches an emotional peak around the half way point, and leaves a lot of room for the landing strip. This is just a year in Mara's life, maybe one of the most important but there'll be another year after that, her circumstances are the only thing consistent about her. It's shocking how much she's grown.

I step forward into new games that, unfortunately, I might not hold so tenderly in my heart. But Perfect Tides: Station to Station is proof that I love video games and what they're capable of bringing out of me. Perfect Tides Forever.